{"id":375,"date":"2023-03-09T20:59:40","date_gmt":"2023-03-09T17:59:40","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.urlahaber.net\/?p=375"},"modified":"2023-03-13T20:43:40","modified_gmt":"2023-03-13T17:43:40","slug":"love-bombing","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.urlahaber.net\/index.php\/love-bombing\/","title":{"rendered":"\u2018Love Bombing, Ghosting, Gaslighting\u2019  E.. Nihayetinde kara toprak"},"content":{"rendered":"\t\t<div data-elementor-type=\"wp-post\" data-elementor-id=\"375\" class=\"elementor elementor-375\">\n\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<section class=\"elementor-section elementor-top-section elementor-element elementor-element-600287b elementor-section-boxed elementor-section-height-default elementor-section-height-default\" data-id=\"600287b\" data-element_type=\"section\">\n\t\t\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-container elementor-column-gap-default\">\n\t\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-column elementor-col-100 elementor-top-column elementor-element elementor-element-a0b25be\" data-id=\"a0b25be\" data-element_type=\"column\">\n\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-widget-wrap elementor-element-populated\">\n\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-element elementor-element-5fa2bcc elementor-widget elementor-widget-heading\" data-id=\"5fa2bcc\" data-element_type=\"widget\" data-widget_type=\"heading.default\">\n\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-widget-container\">\n\t\t\t<style>\/*! elementor - v3.10.2 - 29-01-2023 *\/\n.elementor-heading-title{padding:0;margin:0;line-height:1}.elementor-widget-heading .elementor-heading-title[class*=elementor-size-]>a{color:inherit;font-size:inherit;line-height:inherit}.elementor-widget-heading .elementor-heading-title.elementor-size-small{font-size:15px}.elementor-widget-heading .elementor-heading-title.elementor-size-medium{font-size:19px}.elementor-widget-heading .elementor-heading-title.elementor-size-large{font-size:29px}.elementor-widget-heading .elementor-heading-title.elementor-size-xl{font-size:39px}.elementor-widget-heading .elementor-heading-title.elementor-size-xxl{font-size:59px}<\/style><h2 class=\"elementor-heading-title elementor-size-default\">\u2018Love Bombing, Ghosting, Gaslighting\u2019 \nE.. Nihayetinde kara toprak\n<\/h2>\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-element elementor-element-a0f07da elementor-widget elementor-widget-text-editor\" data-id=\"a0f07da\" data-element_type=\"widget\" data-widget_type=\"text-editor.default\">\n\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-widget-container\">\n\t\t\t<style>\/*! elementor - v3.10.2 - 29-01-2023 *\/\n.elementor-widget-text-editor.elementor-drop-cap-view-stacked .elementor-drop-cap{background-color:#818a91;color:#fff}.elementor-widget-text-editor.elementor-drop-cap-view-framed .elementor-drop-cap{color:#818a91;border:3px solid;background-color:transparent}.elementor-widget-text-editor:not(.elementor-drop-cap-view-default) .elementor-drop-cap{margin-top:8px}.elementor-widget-text-editor:not(.elementor-drop-cap-view-default) .elementor-drop-cap-letter{width:1em;height:1em}.elementor-widget-text-editor .elementor-drop-cap{float:left;text-align:center;line-height:1;font-size:50px}.elementor-widget-text-editor .elementor-drop-cap-letter{display:inline-block}<\/style>\t\t\t\t<p>Modern d\u00fcnya ili\u015fkileri \u00e7ok bozuldu arkada\u015flar. Baya bozuldu, inan\u0131lmaz bozuldu yani. \u00d6yle b\u00f6yle bozulmad\u0131. O kadar bozuldu ki \u00f6n\u00fcn\u00fc alamad\u0131k. Bozuldu, bozuldu, bozulduuu, bir yerden sonra bozulmaz diye bekledik. Daha da bozuldu. Bir yerde duracak herhalde dedik ama yine bozuldu. Evet, t\u0131pk\u0131 \u201cLost\u201d gibi.<\/p><p>Teknolojik geli\u015fmeler ve sonucunda sosyal medyan\u0131n hayat\u0131m\u0131za girmesi ile istedi\u011fimiz zaman istedi\u011fimiz her \u015feye, herkese ula\u015fabilme l\u00fcks\u00fcne sahip olduk. \u0130yi mi oldu. Bence on numara bir konfor getirdi hayat\u0131m\u0131za. Lakin ili\u015fkiler de ayn\u0131 h\u0131zla bozuldu, \u00f6zellikle romantik ili\u015fkiler.<\/p><p>Yaz\u0131n\u0131n ba\u015fl\u0131\u011f\u0131ndaki bu giri\u015f, geli\u015fme ve sonu\u00e7 evrelerinden olu\u015fan konuyu biz de konu\u015fal\u0131m istedim. Bakal\u0131m nas\u0131l oluyormu\u015f bu hastal\u0131kl\u0131 ili\u015fkiler.<\/p><p><strong>Love bombing: A\u015fk bombard\u0131man\u0131<\/strong><\/p><p>\u0130li\u015fkinin giri\u015f a\u015famas\u0131 Love-boming. T\u00fcrk\u00e7e kar\u015f\u0131l\u0131\u011f\u0131yla a\u015fk bombard\u0131man\u0131, genellikle narsist partnerin uygulad\u0131\u011f\u0131 bir fl\u00f6rt \u015fiddetiymi\u015f. \u0130li\u015fkinin ba\u015flar\u0131nda yo\u011fun sevgi g\u00f6sterilerine maruz kalman\u0131z, d\u00fcnyan\u0131n 8. harikas\u0131 oldu\u011funuza inand\u0131r\u0131lman\u0131z, s\u00fcrprizler, hediyeler, z\u0131rt p\u0131rt g\u00f6nderilen \u00e7i\u00e7ekler, be\u015f dakika bile olsa sizi g\u00f6rmek i\u00e7in taaa uzaklardan gelmesi love-bombing olabilir. (Ama olmaya da bilir. Kimseyi zan alt\u0131nda b\u0131rakmak istemem. \u0130li\u015fkinin gidi\u015fat\u0131 size bunun yan\u0131t\u0131n\u0131 verir zaten. Yaz\u0131y\u0131 okumaya devan edin ve siz karar verin.) \u00a0Birden bire a\u015fka gelen bu narsistler a\u015fk bombard\u0131man\u0131na tuttu\u011fu ki\u015fiyi a\u011f\u0131na d\u00fc\u015f\u00fcrmek i\u00e7in ilgisini kazanmaya \u00e7al\u0131\u015f\u0131r. (Belgesel \u00e7ekiyoruz sanki) Bunu yapmaktaki amac\u0131 da partneri \u00fczerinden kendini g\u00f6rebilmekmi\u015f. Kar\u015f\u0131 taraf\u0131 bo\u011fdu\u011fu her g\u00fczel s\u00f6z asl\u0131nda kendisine yans\u0131yan bir \u0131\u015f\u0131k gibiymi\u015f. Narsist arkada\u015flar\u0131n hedefi kendisini her daim onaylayan ve \u00fczerinde duygusal egemenlik kurabildi\u011fi bir partner bulmakm\u0131\u015f. E tabi kar\u015f\u0131s\u0131ndaki ki\u015fi bu ilginin kendisinin \u00f6zel ve de\u011ferli biri oldu\u011fu d\u00fc\u015f\u00fcncesiyle narsistik bireyden etkilenmeye ve hatta ba\u011flanmaya ba\u015fl\u0131yor. Saf\u0131m benim.<\/p><p><strong>Ghosting: Hayalete d\u00f6n\u00fc\u015fen Narsistler<\/strong><\/p><p>\u015eimdi gelelim geli\u015fme b\u00f6l\u00fcm\u00fcndeki ghosting yani ortadan kaybolma k\u0131sm\u0131na. A\u015fk\u0131n\u0131 hunharca bombalayan narsist, kar\u015f\u0131 taraftan yeterince onay ve ilgiyi alamazsa o ki\u015fiden beslenemiyor, s\u0131k\u0131l\u0131yor ve bir anda t\u00fcm ileti\u015fimini kesiyor. B\u00f6ylelikle ka\u00e7an kovalan\u0131r mant\u0131\u011f\u0131yla d\u00fc\u015f\u00fcnen narsist \u00f6zne, kar\u015f\u0131 tarafa ghosting uygulamaya ba\u015fl\u0131yor. Yeterince be\u011fenilmedi\u011fini ve \u00f6nemsenmedi\u011fini d\u00fc\u015f\u00fcnd\u00fc\u011f\u00fc i\u00e7in gidip ba\u015fka birinin hayat\u0131n\u0131 karartay\u0131m bari diyerek \u2018\u00f6teki\u2019 aray\u0131\u015f\u0131na giriyor. Narsist partnerin zor karakterine maruz kalan insana da ge\u00e7mi\u015f olsun, psikolojik fl\u00f6rt \u015fiddetine maruz kal\u0131yor. Neden birden ilgi alaka kesildi, nerede bu insan, nereye gitti, neden aram\u0131yor diye karalara ba\u011fl\u0131yor.<\/p><p><strong>Gaslihting: Manip\u00fclasyon<\/strong><\/p><p>\u0130\u015fte geldik danan\u0131n kuyru\u011funun koptu\u011fu yere. 2022 y\u0131l\u0131n\u0131n kelimesi se\u00e7ilen gaslighting; bir ki\u015finin, di\u011fer ki\u015fi \u00fczerinde daha fazla g\u00fc\u00e7 elde edebilmek amac\u0131yla kurban\u0131n\u0131n ger\u00e7ekli\u011fi sorgulamas\u0131na neden olmas\u0131 olarak tan\u0131mlan\u0131yor.\u00a0Partnerinin kendisine olan g\u00fcvenini ve sevgisini kullanarak kendisini de\u011fersiz hissetmesini sa\u011flayan narsistin amac\u0131 ki\u015fiyi kendine ba\u011f\u0131ml\u0131 hale getirmek. \u00c7\u00fcnk\u00fc narsistler kendilerini besleyecek ve ona kendisini m\u00fckemmelmi\u015f gibi hissettirecek kayna\u011f\u0131 kaybetmek istemezler. Gaslightingin bir\u00e7ok y\u00f6ntemi varm\u0131\u015f ama bence en a\u011f\u0131r\u0131 \u015fu. \u00a0Narsistin partnerinde aldat\u0131l\u0131yormu\u015f hissi uyand\u0131rmas\u0131. Bunun i\u00e7in narsist \u015f\u00fcpheli davran\u0131\u015flar sergiler, s\u00f6ylemlerde bulunur, gizem yarat\u0131r ve hatta partnerinin bulabilece\u011fi yerlere aldat\u0131ld\u0131\u011f\u0131na dair izler b\u0131rak\u0131r. Do\u011fal olarak partneri de \u015f\u00fcphelenir ve t\u00fcm \u015f\u00fcphelerini ortaya d\u00f6ker. Bu noktada manip\u00fcle eden ki\u015fi sert bir tav\u0131r kullanarak g\u00fcvensizlik su\u00e7lamalar\u0131 yapmaya ba\u015flar, i\u015fi daha ileriye g\u00f6t\u00fcrerek kurban\u0131n zihninde kendi kendine olan g\u00fcvenini sarsacak d\u00fc\u015f\u00fcncelerin olu\u015fmas\u0131n\u0131 sa\u011flar. Kafas\u0131nda bu d\u00fc\u015f\u00fcnceleri kurgulayan kurban zamanla problemli biri oldu\u011funu d\u00fc\u015f\u00fcnmeye ba\u015flar ve ger\u00e7ekten aldat\u0131lsa bile bu d\u00fc\u015f\u00fcnceyi sadece kafas\u0131nda kurdu\u011funu d\u00fc\u015f\u00fcnerek kendine k\u0131zar.<\/p><p><strong>Ger\u00e7ek benli\u011fin ortaya koyuldu\u011fu ili\u015fkiler besleyicidir<\/strong><\/p><p>B\u00f6yle bireylerle ba\u015f etmeye \u00e7al\u0131\u015f\u0131rken ne dediklerine de\u011fil ne yapt\u0131klar\u0131na bakmak gerek. Zira s\u00f6yledikleri \u015feyler genelde anlams\u0131zd\u0131r ve g\u00fcn\u00fc ge\u00e7i\u015ftirme ama\u00e7l\u0131d\u0131r. Eylemleri ise esas hedeflerini ortaya koyar. Size kendinizi de\u011fersiz hissettiren bu bireyler, bazen yapt\u0131klar\u0131n\u0131zdan dolay\u0131 sizi \u00f6verler. Bu durumda siz de onlar\u0131n o kadar da k\u00f6t\u00fc olmad\u0131klar\u0131n\u0131 d\u00fc\u015f\u00fcnmeye ba\u015flars\u0131n\u0131z ancak bunun da hedefi sizin ger\u00e7ekli\u011fi sorgulaman\u0131zd\u0131r. Kafan\u0131z\u0131 kar\u0131\u015ft\u0131r\u0131rlar \u00e7\u00fcnk\u00fc kafa kar\u0131\u015f\u0131kl\u0131\u011f\u0131n\u0131n insanlar\u0131 zay\u0131flatt\u0131\u011f\u0131n\u0131 bilirler. Bir bakm\u0131\u015fs\u0131n\u0131z ilmek ilmek \u00f6rd\u00fc\u011f\u00fcn\u00fcz benli\u011finiz da\u011f\u0131lm\u0131\u015f, ruhunuzun dengesi bozulmu\u015f. Bu y\u00fczden ay\u0131k olmakta fayda var. \u00c7\u00fcnk\u00fc bu tip insanlar her yerde.<\/p><p>E\u015f olarak se\u00e7ti\u011fimiz ki\u015fi hayat\u0131m\u0131zdaki her \u015feyi besler. Ruh sa\u011f\u0131l\u0131\u011f\u0131m\u0131z\u0131, huzurumuzu, i\u00e7imizdeki sevgiyi, mutlulu\u011fu, ba\u015far\u0131lar\u0131m\u0131z\u0131, trajedilerden nas\u0131l kurtuldu\u011fumuzu, \u00e7ocuklar\u0131m\u0131z\u0131 nas\u0131l yeti\u015ftirece\u011fimizi ve \u00e7ok daha fazlas\u0131n\u0131. Ger\u00e7ek benli\u011fin ortaya koyuldu\u011fu ili\u015fkiler besleyicidir. Partnerimizi ak\u0131ll\u0131ca se\u00e7elim.<\/p><p>Peki siz kendinizden bir \u015feyler buldunuz mu bu anlat\u0131lanlarda?<\/p><p>Kurban m\u0131s\u0131n\u0131z, yoksa narsist mi?<\/p><p>Umar\u0131m se\u00e7ene\u011finiz hi\u00e7 biridir.<\/p><p>Sava\u015fmak yerine anla\u015fmay\u0131 tercih eden, empati kurabilen, dengenizi bozmayan aksine size olumlu duygular ya\u015fatan, \u00f6z\u00fcr dilemeyi ve g\u00f6n\u00fcl almay\u0131 bilen, \u015fefkat g\u00f6sterebilen, duygu ve d\u00fc\u015f\u00fcncelerini maskelemeden rahatl\u0131kla ifade eden, ne istedi\u011fini bilen net insanlar\u0131n varl\u0131\u011f\u0131 paha bi\u00e7ilemez.<\/p><p>Geri kalanlar ise;<\/p><p>Love-bombing, ghosting, gaslighting. Eee, nihayetinde de kara toprak be karde\u015fim.<\/p>\t\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t<\/section>\n\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>\u2018Love Bombing, Ghosting, Gaslighting\u2019 E.. Nihayetinde kara toprak Modern d\u00fcnya ili\u015fkileri \u00e7ok bozuldu arkada\u015flar. Baya bozuldu, inan\u0131lmaz bozuldu yani. \u00d6yle b\u00f6yle bozulmad\u0131. O kadar bozuldu ki \u00f6n\u00fcn\u00fc alamad\u0131k. Bozuldu, bozuldu, bozulduuu, bir yerden sonra bozulmaz diye bekledik. Daha da bozuldu. Bir yerde duracak herhalde dedik ama yine bozuldu. Evet, t\u0131pk\u0131 \u201cLost\u201d gibi. Teknolojik geli\u015fmeler ve [&hellip;]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":10,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[21],"tags":[23],"class_list":["post-375","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-gundem","tag-elvan-karanfil"],"aioseo_notices":[],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.urlahaber.net\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/375","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.urlahaber.net\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.urlahaber.net\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.urlahaber.net\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/10"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.urlahaber.net\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=375"}],"version-history":[{"count":5,"href":"https:\/\/www.urlahaber.net\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/375\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":380,"href":"https:\/\/www.urlahaber.net\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/375\/revisions\/380"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.urlahaber.net\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=375"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.urlahaber.net\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=375"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.urlahaber.net\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=375"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}